Why Am I Always Late?
Anyone else have trouble being late, or signing up for too many things, or double booking your calendar? I got to thinking about it and I have two theories about what causes these problems and a tip or two to solve for them.
NUMBER ONE
We don't create margins/buffers/white space around each activity. If you are realistic and look at what you have assigned yourself (or life has assigned to you) for the week, you will probably find you are overbooked. The margins, buffers, and white space are what keep you cheerful, positive, and optimistic, and give you a fighting chance. I live in DC, and after 30ish years I’ve finally accepted that is traffic, and there will always be traffic. In the middle of the night you might be able to get from point A to point B in 20 minutes, but by the light of day you know there will be construction, and you know you will forget something. Plan for it. We make ourselves crazy, we yell at our kids, we shame our spouses when we don't have margins/buffers/white space.
Please take two things OFF your calendar for next week, then add 10 minutes to all of your estimated car trips. Email me next week, and tell me all the delicious things that happened to you in those margins, buffers, and white spaces.
NUMBER TWO
We are not realistic. We are working full-time and signing up to volunteer like we have 20 extra hours a week. Or we enroll in a class but don't add in the 12 hours of studying per week we need to complete to get the A we are looking for. Maybe we love to agree to do things and savor that moment of possibility. However, we never actually get to doing the thing we said we'd do. Or we might overbook, double-book, and then spend a bunch of our time re-scheduling, re-jiggering, apologizing, and feeling bad about ourselves. The time you have is the time you have. Wishing, hoping, acting or dreaming that you have more time doesn’t make it true.
Do yourself, your family, your kids, your spouse, and your fellow drivers a favor and be realistic. Remember, new realities get thrown at us every day: we get a sinus infection, and our energy is low. Our spouse or child gets injured, and suddenly we have to do much more nursing/driving/caring for people than we were used to.
Practice being realistic with your current reality (and the real one, not the one you wished you had, or the one from last month, or the one you dream will be in the future!). Then enjoy the fruits of your labor when you are on time (or even early)!